Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Feeling restless

Make sure to start the video as a background to reading this post :-)

Not long ago I posted on FB that I've felt like running away more as an adult than I ever did as a kid.  That is so true.  Lately I've been thinking that this life is just wrong, I and all of my family with me are not where we ought to be.  I mean that in more than one way, but mostly I mean we are in a big house in a city and that sucks.  Also, I work in San Francisco, and I really hate that.  The city is sort of disgusting to tell the truth, in the moral sense, and in the olfactory sense.  It is crowded, noisy and unpleasant in every way.

I live too far from work and end up either sleep deprived or missing my family by staying in San Francisco day after day while I earn money to "live" in Tracy.  Tracy stinks as well, but at least that is honest cow manure and not the stench of human waste.  Even though I have a place to stay in San Francisco, due to the generosity of a good friend who lets me stay in her spare room, I really do not like not being at home.

What am I going to do about this?  I don't know yet but something needs to change, and fast.  Maybe we need to buy a plot of land somewhere and live a very simple life with less money and more home life.  I hesitate to bring it up to my family but you know what?  I'm the one who is paying for most everything now, and yet I'm not getting the benefit of it, being away most of the time while everyone else is living in "my" house 24-7.  This just isn't working for me.  As Eric Burdon and the Animals sang so long ago "We've gotta get out of this place!"

Heh, when I saw this I at first thought it said "Follow your heart" which is good, but I like it even better once I realized it says "Fallow".  Fallow land is land that is being allowed to rest and recover for a while.  I need to rest.  :-)

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